a brief summary
Recently, a large part of me has been enjoying music more than the visual arts. I ventured off into creating music about a year ago and started practicing the Bass, Piano, and Drums. These are the three main instruments of the music genre that I enjoy the most. Hip Hop. The most common view on Hip Hop is its drugged up, gang related, violent culture, but this can be a very ignorant and stereotypical concept of what Hip Hop is or stems from. Hip Hop's origins was all undeniably political and the reality is that Hip Hop culture in its entirety is very diverse and ever growing. It is and can be a tool for communication and empowerment, and many artists/musicians have created sub genres and styles that take Hip Hop towards beneficial territory.
The utilization and manipulation of icons, symbols, and pop culture are irreversibly ingrained into what Hip Hop is today, very Trap oriented. What I want to take from Hip Hop though is a sub genre called Lo-fi. This sub genre has shaped itself into a melting pot of internet culture, that of a whole new era of social media and Memes that is still in its infancy. This is surprisingly important to discuss as it takes into consideration the use and manipulation of icons, symbols, and pop culture. Through this, communication, empowerment, or even individuality can flourish.
So, now that I have unjustifiably explained the music that I enjoy creating and plan to utilize in conjunction with my visual arts, I still find the need to explain the underlying reason of why I am doing so, and how I am going to go about attempting to actually do so. So here goes.
I know, edgy.
Yet this is my reality, and I don't know how to shake it off yet. One thing that has completely turned my world around is this subjective fact, that everything I am doing now is tied towards coping with my offsets stemming from a "traumatic" experience. So this is TL;DR why I am doing this Installation.
EXPLANATIONS OF THE "WHY"
So my "traumatic" experience happens. From it comes growth. Through growth comes understanding. Dysthemia is discovered, a persistent depressive disorder. Contemplation of childhood and life, adulthood and individuality. Realizations of how all of that has shaped me into who and how I am today. Then comes why I am so fascinated with the arts and music, and most importantly, the human condition. This fascination ties back to everything.
Now I understand my itch for creating music and art. In fact, I started passionately drawing/painting because of a heartbreak back in high school, and before that I even drew a lot as a kid because of my then abusive parents. In fact, before anything, when I was in elementary and middle school I would always create small figures out of trash bag wires. I sculpted and did some stop motion too, I remember I even wanted to create little clothes for my figures and sets. My uncle called me a faggot for it though, and that completely ruined me for a while, in fact I never picked up clay again until high school. So stupid. I realize now that all of this was a sense of escape, a venture into my ideas and thoughts. I still remember the sole reason I kept doing any of this, and that was the bliss that came from creating. I can definitely say for certain that through my pain I grew wonder and passion, and even to this day they are inseparable.
So back to the "traumatic" experience. This happens late 2017. I venture off into music as a subconscious coping mechanism, just like the visual arts. I eventually learn that I enjoy this form of creation as it touches on the sense of sound, this is something new to me. I then focus on visualizing "soundscapes", an intangible expression, exists in the mind and body. I fall in love with this, I also fall in love with Hip Hop culture, as well as the sub genre that is Lo-fi.
So now, the bread and butter
Ugh, that took a while, condensing everything into a bite size snack for you. But it is very much needed because it explains the subject matter of the proposed installation and how/why I want to utilize ceramics into this.
Basically, I am doing a self portrait, or more a depiction of my experiences in life. I am feeding the viewer my thoughts and ideas and trying to convey my emotions onto them. To make the viewer feel what I felt and feel. I decided that an installation would suit this idea best, not only for achieving an experience, but by also creating an actual space for this accumulation of expression to exist in. This ties into my influence which is touched upon in the paragraph about 【ＶＡＰＯＲＷＡＶＥ】.